What Dalai Wants for Christmas

Well, Hanukkah, actually, but I try to be eclectic at this time of year.

I have loved Swiss Army Knives from the first time I saw one as a child. They are fascinating devices, and of course, the more blades and tools, the better.

You may know that there are two competing companies making these little jewels, Wenger and Victorinox. Click HERE for a full history of the Wenger operation, and HERE for the Victorinox story.

Wenger periodically offers an Elite version for collectors and so forth, and this year, their masterpiece is like nothing you've ever seen, at least available for sale. In fact, it is noted in the Guiness Book of World Records:

Here are the specs:

• 85 Implements110 Functions
  2.5" 60% Serrated locking blade
  Nail file, nail cleaner
  Corkscrew
  Adjustable pliers with wire crimper and cutter
  Removable screwdriver bit adapter
  2.5" Blade for Official World Scout Knife
  Spring-loaded, locking needle-nose pliers with wire cutter
  Removable screwdriver bit holder
  Phillips head screwdriver bit 0
  Phillips head screwdriver bit 1
  Phillips head screwdriver bit 2
  Flat head screwdriver bit 0.5mm x 3.5mm
  Flat head screwdriver bit 0.6mm x 4.0mm
  Flat head screwdriver bit 1.0mm x 6.5mm
  Magnetized recessed bit holder
  Double-cut wood saw with ruler (inch & cm)
  Bike chain rivet setter, removable 5mm allen wrench, screwdriver for slotted and philips head screws
  Removable tool for adjusting bike spokes, 10mm hexagonal key for nuts
  Removable 4mm curved allen wrench with philips head screwdriver
  Removable 10mm hexagonal key
  Patented locking philips head screwdriver
  Universal wrench
  2.4" Springless scissors with serrated, self-sharpening design
  1.65" Clip point utility blade
  Philips head screwdriver
  2.5" Clip point blade
  Golf club face cleaner
  2.4" Round tip blade
  Patented locking screwdriver, cap lifter, can opener
  Golf shoe spike wrench
  Golf divot repair tool
  4mm allen wrench
  2.5" blade
  Fine metal file with precision screwdriver
  Double-cut wood saw
  Cupped cigar cutter with double-honed edges
  12/20-Guage choke tube tool
  Watch caseback opening tool
  Snap shackle
  Mineral crystal magnifier with precision screwdriver
  Compass, straight edge, ruler (in./cm)
  Telescopic pointer
  Fish scaler, hook disgorger, line guide
  Shortix laboratory key
  Micro tool holder
  Micro tool adapter
  Micro scraper - straight
  Micro scraper - curved
  Laser pointer with 300 ft. range
  Metal saw, metal file
  Flashlight
  Micro tool holder
  Philips head screwdriver 1.5mm
  Screwdriver 1.2mm
  Screwdriver .8mm
  Fine fork for watch spring bars
  Reamer
  Pin punch 1.2mm
  Pin punch .8mm
  Round needle file
  Removable tool holder with expandable receptacle
  Removable tool holder
  Special self-centering screwdriver for gunsights
  Flat philips head screwdriver
  Chisel-point reamer
  Mineral crystal magnifier, fork for watch spring bars, small ruler
  Extension tool
  Spring-loaded, locking flat nose-nose pliers with wire cutter
  Removable screwdriver bit holder
  Phillips head screwdriver bit 0
  Phillips head screwdriver bit 1
  Phillips head screwdriver bit 2
  Flat head screwdriver bit 0.5mm x 3.5mm
  Flat head screwdriver bit 0.6mm x 4.0mm
  Flat head screwdriver bit 1.0mm x 6.5mm
  Magnetized recessed bit holder
  Tire tread gauge
  Fiber optic tool holder
  Can opener
  Patented locking screwdriver, cap lifter, wire stripper
  Reamer/awl
  Toothpick
  Tweezers
  Key ring
  Actual Size: 8.75. W x 3.25. L
  Weight: 2lbs 11oz
  Limited lifetime warranty
  Made in Switzerland

So, GE and Agfa...if you're in the process of selecting my Christmas gift, this is what I really, really, REALLY want. Remember, it's the Wenger Giant Swiss Army Knife™ V1.0, Model #16999. Oh, the price? Only $1,200.00. But I'm worth it, right?